Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
