How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
