hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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