So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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