I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize