Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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