do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
