Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
She's not a foreskin expert like you
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize