Where is the hickey?
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
