is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
