Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
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