Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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