I bet he comes in French.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize