Im at strip club and am horny
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Floor bacon is actually really good
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