yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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