Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize