I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize