I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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