im about as happy as oj after his trial
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
