He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
