Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
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