after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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