Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
