forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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