I bet he comes in French.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize