What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
wakey wakey hands off snakey
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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