Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
