Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
