oh god the rape fog is back!
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize