remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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