Are we in a gay sports bar?
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
