Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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