Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
