How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
