on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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