But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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