I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
