I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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