Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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