How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
