I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
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