forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize