is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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