U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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