I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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