He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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