They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
