my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
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i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
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So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
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