There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
