There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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