awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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